During the Desert Times...

via.

I've been out of breath lately from running in circles, figuratively speaking that is. Other emotions/feelings that I've been having are exhaustion, confusion, frustration, imperfection, and undeserving. I always hate these seasons that seem to creep up. You know, the kind where every verse seems to hit home, step on those toes and frankly, fit exactly a situation that your working through etc. Those dreadful desert seasons. Why is it that during these dry spells the rain storm in the forecast seems so far away?

Believing... Actually understanding and believing that the rain is coming is one of the hardest things for me. Sometimes I just need that daily [or more than daily] reminder that it WILL happen in His timing. Let's be honest, patience doesn't come easy for me. It takes me a long time and it's a diffucult process for me to accept the fact that when it's all said and done I have to just wait and trust. Even though, my mind is telling me... if only you could do this to help or this to make it get here faster, etc. That's the point where the frustration kicks in and I feel like I'm not doing enough. I feel like all I'm doing is running in circles making the same mistakes basking on the same problems and not letting them go. Although, I'm striving hard to fulfill the plan that God has planted in my heart.

Having a mirage [an optical illusion of a sheet of water appearing in the desert or on a hot road] is a perfect example of the confusion feeling. I can "see" it and almost taste/feel it but it's soooo far away and what if it just doesn't exsist realistically? Am I putting my own personal thoughts before God's plan? Afterall, He knows all things and can see the bigger picture.

And this is where I insert the most important part where I CHOOSE to be happy in His plan AND His timing. The deserts that I am going through are only to strengthen me and mold me into the person He wants me to be. I wish I could say that I am always able to right away go to God for some wisdom and comfort rather then worrying, doubting and throwing questions at Him. He has blessed me tremendously with a best friend that I can go to at all times for comfort, encouragement, support and most importantly will point me to God and challenge me. He's a trooper I tell you with my many mini meltdowns. I thank God each and everyday for my man! I am so undeserving but so greatful that God has brought us together [maybe some day I'll write more on this].

So here's to getting up when your down, being patient for the rain to come, smiling and enjoying this season of life and looking to God for guidance and direction.


I won't be shaken by drought or storm. The peace that passes understanding is my song. My hope is in You alone!